Monday, August 3, 2009

Always know the perfect response to every situation

Picture a young girl lying on her back on the grass, watching the clouds roll on . . . or a middle-aged woman picking weeds in her garden . . . or an older man leaning over the edge of the dock focusing on his fishing line.

What does each have in common? They are alone. Did you imagine they might be happier if in a group? They may be more content to have a friend near by? Someone with whom to frolic or garden or fish?

Perhaps not. They may be embracing solitude. Solitude is a state where we notice things we have not ever noticed before even though we are in familiar territory. In solitude we accept what we notice, as it is, deeply, richly appreciating each fringe of a cloud, the roots of a weed, or even the empty fishing line for hours at a time.

Solitude is for people from all walks of life, all ages, gender or backgrounds. To embrace solitude means we begin to really see ourselves, accept ourselves, then make choices about how we want to experience our lives.

Solitude is not about being alone or being lonely. Solitude is the prize for being fully present in each moment of our lives, embracing the situation we are in and not trying to change. One of the benefits of solitude then becomes our recognition of the perfection of life, from moment to moment. We lose that sense of perfection when we begin to compare situations, express preferences like “I wish it were another way?” or desire different outcomes, “Why did that have to happen to me?” Indeed, with every “why” there is a “why not?”

If this sounds cryptic to you, yet piques your interest, know that there are many ways to achieve solitude. If cloud watching, pulling weeds or fishing does not make sense to you, there are techniques thousands of years old like yoga, meditation and labyrinth walking. More recently personal growth techniques have evolved such as collaging and journaling. Other therapies are available to you as well as teachers and mentors willing to support you on this inner journey. That is what solitude really is – a space inside you. When you are there you are comfortable in your own skin, doing what you do because you enjoy it, fully present to your current situation. Relaxed, calm and energized.

If you want to know more about embracing solitude for yourself, join a yoga class to learn the basics of yoga and meditation techniques you can soon practice on your own. Choose a mentor such as a Life Coach to guide your initial steps, or simply immerse yourself in nature. As you grow in awareness, you will always know the perfect response to every situation.

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